Military Spouse Magazine

FEB 2019

Issue link:

Contents of this Issue


Page 14 of 35

something I am circumspect about; I don't trust my children with just any- one. Trusting someone with my son's memory is just as nerve wracking. The complicated questions about my kids are about to come up a lot. My hus- band just received new orders; we'll move soon. While I feel ready for the practicali- ties of the upcoming move, I'm already painfully aware that I will end up having "the conversation" many times as we settle in to our new duty station, meet new people, go on new playdates, and weave ourselves into the fabric of a new home. I'll have to feel out new friends for their worthiness of this raw piece of my personal history. I'll continue to work to make my girls understand the valuable role their brother plays in our family as he becomes a more distant memory to Ellie and even less tangible a concept to Poppy. We'll no longer be in the place where I was pregnant with Sam, the last place where he was alive. We'll no longer be in the place where Sam was buried. Without those physical connections to him, the emotional ones will have to be the ones I lean on to keep his memory alive. So maybe in our new duty sta- tion, when someone asks me how many kids I have, I'll start saying, "I have two girls at home. And one very special little boy, who we had to leave behind…" H Photo credit: Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep is a nonprofit organization that provides free professional remembrance photography to parents suffering the loss of a baby, FEBRUARY 2019 / MILITARYSPOUSE.COM 15

Articles in this issue

Links on this page

Archives of this issue

view archives of Military Spouse Magazine - FEB 2019